The Open Road – Letter 6

Mr. Miller,

Now this is what I call trucking! Two cool guys, cruising down Route 40 in their trusted vehicle Barbara, watching a buddy-comedy movie marathon, one hand-cuffed to his seat, and the other meeting lots of sexy girls and making love to them in the back seat of the cab. I love this, Mr. Miller! I want to be a trucker forever!

We’re staying in a small motel on the outskirts of Albuquerque, New Mexico. I can’t tell you where exactly because I’m sure you’ll have half the fleet after us trying to stop us from being movie stars, and that just ain’t happening.

Haha, I’m not sure why I said “we’re,” Eddie is sleeping in the truck tonight because of his little “attempt to assault me,” earlier today. It’s amazing how men can get such quick bursts of strength when they think their livelihood is endangered. I just got a little distracted during Tommy Boy and the truck just went a little into the New Mexico desert. According to Roadgames that stuff is just par for the course for us truckers.

Eddie is playing his role of the “disgruntled vet,” perfectly. He keeps yelling about how I “don’t know how to drive a truck,” or that he’ll “destroy every molecule of my soul once he get released.” He even pretended to hate Twins and knocked himself out half-way through it by smashing his head against the dashboard.

If you’ve begun to worry, Mr. Miller, don’t.  We’ve got this 100% under control. Once we make gobs of money being the funniest friends who don’t always see eye to eye that Hollywood has ever seen we’ll deliver this crap load of popcorn to Saskatoon or whatever. Just trust us, we’re truckers.

Keep an eye out for the previews of our upcoming flick!

-Danny, the trucker

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